I admit it. I’ve been out of the loop when it comes to hoops. After Jordan entered and crushed everybody, I lost interest. But last weekend, I managed to catch a few games of the NBA playoffs. It sucked.

I have never been a devoted professional basketball fan. Being a native of Colorado, the Nuggets have almost always sucked out loud. I used to play a little—strictly J.V. second string type stuff, but I always enjoyed it. I also coached pee-wee basketball, which was probably the most fun I ever had in a basketball setting.

I remember teaching kids, “basketball is a physical game” and how to “box out” to get the rebound and use their bodies to build space in which to move and pass, but I never imagined that basketball would end up consisting almost entirely of huge people throwing each other around, hurling themselves toward the key, slamming one another to the floor, tripping, pushing, shoving, elbows flying and, above all else, they travel. It seems pros are allowed three to four steps to get a full-speed run at the object of their collision.

I detect little grace. The skill is still there, but let’s face it, shoving a 300 pound human under the basket, letting him clear some room with his butt and elbows, then feeding him the ball is pretty easy. The only way to combat it is to shove back.